Monday, August 10, 2009

Too much 2 handle

As a libran, I always wanted balance.
At least the type that benefits myself more.
But it is the fact that ntg is perfect.
Now I've only made myself in more trouble and responsibility.
I've too much to be handle by only myself.
Studies, family, relationship.
From most of them in my family, it seems to them that i'm trouble free.
Most of the time I'm just given more and more responsibility.
These responsibility is more than I've ask.
Not only that, but I do look like an idiot running all the errands.
It's always not an easy job when it comes to running my family.
Not that it's a lot of work, but lots of feedback.
Sometimes, even studies is easier than staying at home.
Father is the source of financial who seldom spend time or even effort to look at wat's happening in the house.
Mother who used to be the caretaker is now often busy with her own plans.
Brother is longer the small little bro that I used to have.
He used to be obedient, quiet and caring.
Somehow missed the time that my grandpa is around.
He understands me, help me when I got into trouble, makes me happy when i'm sad.
When we grow, our parents just provide the material needs but had neglected the main thing in a family. The care, attention, and love is neglected.
Sometimes extra effort taken is not appreciated.
Extra time given in helping is wasted.
Really wonders y I trap myself in managing a family which brings no improvement.
Just like y I continue running behind to push those left behind and y not just run ahead when I could & just abandon those behind.
Y work hard when I just end up being treat the same?
Y make myself into so much trouble?
Y?